There are nights where the very people we depend on for income and conversationβour customersβleave us feeling like caged animals questioning why decided to work in the industry.
Meet Harry.
A few weeks ago I was working a slow Monday night shift. I had two customers at the barβ an attractive, 40-something business woman in town for a conference and a 50-something salesman who told me about his two kids while showing me photos of the cabin he is currently renovating. Both of them were pleasant, and I was grateful to have their company.
Around 11pm I was given the go-ahead to close the bar for the night from my manager and just as I was about to do last call for them, a man stumbled into the bar on permanent crutches (we will call him Harry).Β Harry sat down and immediately demanded a βKetel One straight.β
I grabbed a rocks glass and a jigger, measured out two ounces and placed it on a napkin in front of. He looked at his drink and said,Β βThatβs it?β
βThatβs two ounces. You saw me measure it. You are welcome to buy a double if you would like.β I replied, annoyed by his entitlement.
βFine. Make it a double. There is barely anything in here.βΒ Harry continued, while wincing at the drink as though he was looking at an empty glass.
I measured out another two ounces in front of him, poured it from the jigger into his drink and asked if he would like to open a tab (I secretly was hoping he would say no so I could continue closing.)
He shot all four ounces back in a single gulp, slammed his rocks glass on the bar threw a visa card towards me and said,Β βanother one.β
Naturally, I felt the need to call my manager over and take control of the situation as I was beyond annoyed by Harryβs behavior.Β My manager handed him a glass of water alongside his tab and asked him to leave.
As every hospitality worker knows, alcohol releases people of their inhibitionsβΒ and sometimes transforms them from Jekyll to Hyde. This reality can be an entertaining aspect of our jobs or it can be extremely aggravating.
Handling Harry
So whatβs a bartender to do when βHarryβ walks through the door?
Shift your perspective from negative to positive:
Itβs easy to become annoyed (I certainly was) and angry with people like Harry who come across as ungrateful and miserable. The reality is, people who are happy and fulfilled donβt act like Harryβ keep that in mind as you serve your Harrys of the world.
The Harry I was serving had a physical disabilityβ one of his legs was much shorter than the other. Based on his commentary and presence, it seemed he was desperately trying to overcompensate for what he viewed as a disadvantage. I certainly donβt know his story but I do know is his life wasnβt where he wanted it to be.
Trust your instinct:
If Harry comes in and seems intoxicated and you feel uneasy about serving him then donβt. You are the bartender, and you are responsible for the alcohol you serve to others. You have the power to choose whom to serve at all times. If someone seems drunk, donβt feel bad about cutting him or her off.
Focus your attention on pleasant customers:
You are not a caged animal forced to perform for every person who walks through the doors of your bar. If a customer is disrespecting you in any way quickly move on to the next person.
Allow management to step in if things get uncomfortable or out of control:
If Harry becomes inappropriate seek attention of management or security. Alcohol is no excuse for sexual or any other kind of harassment and there is no reason you need to tolerate it. Rather than becoming upset or taking matters into your own hands, bring in someone who is removed from the situation and able to rectify it peacefully.
Eloquent and thoughtful as always, Antasha! Thanks for sharing π
Thank you Krista! π
So important to trust your instincts. I almost always regret it when I don’t!
Dushan Zaric gives a talk called “How to work a shift and not get upset”. He says when he has a difficult guest he makes up a story in his head about why this guy is so miserable, which makes the bastard a little more relatable. Also he thinks “somebody loves this guy…even if it only his mother”!
So true! I always regret when I don’t trust mine…they are definitely there to guide us, and its especially important when alcohol is involved π
If a guy at your bar is touching a woman at your bar without her consent you need to kick them out at the very least if not call the cops. I don’t see why this even needs to be pointed out